The Greenland Encounter
In early 2022, BOB makes a visit to Greenland to train in Sterility under Nuck Chorris.
To Greenland
In the aftermath of the Restoration of the Mages and after his return from the Wrong Days, BOB was a rather sorry sight. The events of the previous days had exhausted him greatly, and thus, he rested at Burong for a full week. During this time, a terrible shockwave that could be felt all the way to the Gambia washed over the world, and BOB was startled to sense a great amount of Sterility within it.
Having become rather attuned to Sterility after his death, BOB could sense that the source of the event was somewhere far away to the north. Seeing as he was still inexperienced with Sterility, BOB decided to investigate this matter.
After recovering for a few more days, news of the destruction of Iceland had spread to the Gambia, with official reports stating that the island was struck by a meteorite; BOB knew better of course and set out for Iceland that same day.
After travelling for about 3½ hours at Mach 1.3, BOB arrived at the fractured remains of the island. A current of Sterility lingered around the island and led further north, which BOB followed. As he approached Greenland, he could make out a strong presence exuding an aura of sterility moving along the coast of Greenland at super-sonic speed a few hundred metres below sea level. When BOB approached, the being paused for a moment, having clearly noticed him, before resuming its course about a minute later.
This being, of course, was King Arthur, tasked with patrolling the coastline under orders from Nuck Chorris on the lookout for Leafeaters and Sterility pirates. At this point, the past 2 weeks had been rather uneventful since the Leafeaters were brutally beaten by C.H.E.S. not too long ago, and the pirates had all left these waters following the destruction of Iceland.
King Arthur briefly assessed BOB and considered intercepting him but held back for a number of reasons: First, BOB’s sterility—though quite chaotic—surpassed his, and though BOB was likely no match for him in the ocean, King Arthur was far less confident about facing off against him 5km in the air where BOB stood. Secondly, BOB was evidently a Super Ghost, and King Arthur had never heard of a Super Ghost with this level of Sterility amongst the ranks of the Leafeaters, and the only Super Ghost he knew of with any relation to the pirates had been killed not too long ago. Lastly, Nuck had surely noticed BOB at this point and chosen not to take action, so neither would King Arthur. In the end, he merely emptied his 89th cup of algae tea of the day and resumed his patrol.
Arrival
Soon after, BOB spotted a rather dilapidated rustic Scottish castle in the distance; it stuck out like a sore thumb in the frozen wasteland. Upon entering a 15km radius of it, BOB nearly fell out of the sky when an enormous aura of Sterility descended upon him. This aura, of course, emanated from Grigory’s Abyme, which lay below the castle.
As he approched the castle, he was met with a rather odd sight: a middle-aged man wearing a ragged black suit and an oversized fedora was hovering in the air above the castle and began slowly approaching him, all while standing on an antique perambulator. This, of course, was Nuck’s butler, Santiago Petterson, who had been sent by Nuck to receive BOB.
The butler welcomed him to what he called the 'Second Sultanate of Greater Orkney'. For a moment, BOB deliberated whether he should first ask about the rather strange name of the place he now found himself in, or why that man was standing on a perambulator. Before he could do either, Santiago had already flown off towards the castle, so BOB just decided to follow him.
After catching up to Santiago, BOB asked ‘So why did you people... blow up Iceland?'.
‘Oh that was the Leafeaters.’
‘The— the what now?’
Much to BOB’s confusion, Santiago chose not to continue the conversation and instead simply led him through some of the many hallways of the castle until they arrived before an ornate wooden double door. Santiago respectfully knocked on the door before opening it without waiting for a response, revealing a great early-Renaissance-era dining hall.
‘Go in, cofee-drinker’, he said; ‘Grand Vizier Nuck will answer your questions, but beware: such as are not accustomed to consuming oversteeped tea will instead be consumed by the tea.’
This once again left BOB with more questions than answers, and seeing as he made no indication of moving, Santiago gestured towards the hall exasperately before resorting to simply shoving BOB in, after which the butler closed the doors behind him.
Resigning himself to his fate, BOB gradually inspected the hall while hovering across it; at its center stood a long wooden table bearing the marks of centuries. A middle-aged man dressed in traditional Scottish attire sat at the seat of honour, slowly sipping a cup of tea. This, of course, was none other than Nuck Chorris.
‘So you’re the, “Grand Vizier”?’ asked BOB.
‘I am Nuck Chorris, Grand Vizier of the Sultanate Greater Orkney‘, said Nuck.
‘BOB.‘
At this point, from Nuck’s odd title, the fact that his name sounded oddly familiar, to the butler that was flying on a perambulator, and the source of the overwhelming aura of sterility he could sense in this place, BOB had many questions; however, as odd as all of these things may have been, BOB pushed them to the back of his mind and decided to start with the important questions first.
And so, he respectfully sat down at the table and first enquired as to what had happened to Iceland, to which Nuck gave a brief introduction to C.H.E.S.—whom BOB only knew in name as all-but-insane tea fanatics; their age-old enemies, the Leafeaters; as well as the recent battle between the two factions. BOB flinched when Nuck briefly uttered the name of Woodborough Gloucestershire, citing the Problem as the reason for his departure to Greenland; clearly, BOB’s memories of the Wrong Days were all but good.
Of all the things that Nuck told him, Sterility Techniques interested BOB the most. While quite adept at the use of Fertility, it hadn’t been long since his Fertility had been converted to Sterility following his death, for which reason BOB’s proficiency in Sterility was still rather lacking. And so, BOB asked if C.H.E.S. could teach him the proper way of fighting with Sterilty.
Nuck’s Test
In response, Nuck uttered but a singular word. He stood up and walked over to one of the many cupboards that lined the wall, opened it, and after a moment of thinking, produced a small ornate white teacup decorated with a motif of intertwined heathers at the top and holly at the bottom. Returning to the table, he sat back down, put down the cup before BOB, grabbed the equally ornate silver teapot on the table next to him, and poured BOB an entire cup of quality Orkney tea—the same he had been drinking.
‘Drink’, he said.
BOB was not afraid, despite the stories that he had heard about the tea. At once, he imbibed the entirety of the terrible concoction. He had never had tea like this before: its consistency and weight resembled mercury more than something that was supposed to be mostly water, and it burnt his ghostly throat as though he was swallowing liquid fire.
It was at this moment that he understood Santiago’s warning. If he didn’t know better, BOB would have thought Nuck had served him lava. Whatever taste the tea was supposed to have, BOB tasted none of it. Instead, a taste of pure sterility overwhelmed his senses. He started coughing uncontrollably and felt as though his lungs were about to escape his chest. Even as a Super Ghost, he still felt like he had been set ablaze. Immediately, BOB fell off his chair and began wheezing and rolling on the floor, like a top spun out of control.
He knew he could not absorb this and wondered if he could alter the Source of the tea so he could endure it, but alas, there were several reasons why that was not an option: BOB hadn’t truly reached Fertile Apotheosis and wasn’t confident that he could control Source on a whim. Moreover, his head was spinning, and any attempt at a precise manipulation of source would have likely resulted in disaster in that state. Lastly, Nuck may well have noticed and declared his test failed.
And so, BOB resolved to endure it as it was, and what it was was a fight for his life. He knew full well that the tea would grant him Super Death were he to let up for but a moment, as it had many before. Fortunately for BOB however, the tea that had been unable to be absorbed by his untrained body eventually sought a means of escape. It grew hotter and hotter, fueled by his struggle, and started evaporating through his pores. Fifteen minutes later, the tea he had ingested had left his system for good, and BOB lay on the floor, utterly exhausted, and yet left with surprisingly clear skin.
‘You actually survived that; not bad!’ said Nuck, laughing, and emptied another cup of the same tea that BOB had just spent the last 20 minutes fighting for his life with. ‘Still... the tea evaporating, haven’t seen that before’, he added, and BOB thought he briefly saw him look up and away into the distance. ‘But oh well’, he continued, ‘at least you didn’t explode, ha!’ he joked, though BOB wondered whether it truly was a joke.
Nuck then poured himself another cup, emptied that too in one go, stood up from the table, and said ‘come’.
Demonstration
BOB followed Nuck as he led him into a courtyard at the back of the castle; the once lush garden had frozen over after the relocation to Greenland, and many of the trees had been knocked over in the recent battle. Instead of the scent of flowers and bushes, a dense, heavy aura of Sterility hung in the air, emanating from Grigory’s Abyme nearby.
Arriving at the center of the courtyard, Nuck turned to BOB and gave a brief introduction to Sterility Techniques. While a proficient Fertility user, BOB had had little training in the use of Sterility, and as such an overly difficult technique such as Occam’s Razor would have been of little use to him in battle. As such, Nuck opted to teach him Pressure Transfer.
‘Watch’, Nuck said. He waved his hand, and Sterility condensed into a massive 7-ton granite slab in front of them. This was naturally Grand Master Júlio da Silva Fenton-Awnthorpe’s abilty, Seven Sick Stones, which Nuck had used his proficiency in Sterility to replicate.
Nuck walked up to the slab, raised his right arm, and pressed his index finger into the slab. The finger penetrated the slab without resistance, leaving a clearly visible hole as it was retracted. Next, Nuck took two steps back and performed a Pressure Transfer: Raising his arm once more, he gently pushed his finger into the air before him. As he did so, the force of his finger pressing forward was transferred into the air before him, which in turn pushed against the slab. Hundreds of finger-sized holes appeared in the granite in an instant. The slab, which now resembled a great grey block of Swiss cheese, groaned and cracked before shattering under its own weight.
And so, BOB remained at the castle for a few weeks, until he finally performed a successful Pressure Transfer after repeated instruction by King Arthur and several other C.H.E.S. masters.