C.H.E.S.

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The Connoisseurs of Herbally-Enriched Substances, or C.H.E.S., are an organisation dedicated to maximising their Sterility via the consumption of increasingly elaborate and concentrated tea-based concoctions.

There are various dissolute sects across the world who lay claim to the name of ‘C.H.E.S.’, members of which that possess a Sterility level of at least 114,942.044 are dubbed ‘Masters’ and traditionally ranked on the following scale:

C.H.E.S. Mastery Levels
Rank Required Sterility
Master 114,942.044
Intranational Master 739,085.133
Extranational Master 1,414,213.562
Grand Master 2,718,281.828

Known C.H.E.S. Grand Masters include Carlos Søren Magnussen, Nuck Chorris, Grand Vizier of North-East Orkney, King Arthur, Sir Timothy Angus McLeod, and Júlio da Silva Fenton-Awnthorpe.

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