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Sharon Kay

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Revision as of 02:25, 1 September 2024 by King Horror (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{Biography |title = Sharon Ellsworth Kay |image = skay.png |caption = Sharon at a campaign event in 2023 |birth = May 13th, 1962 |career = Walmart General Manager, Presidential Candidate |known_for = running on the Neoliberal Sonic Fans' Party ticket for president in 2024 |parents = Shaun Kay, Darla Kay }} '''Sharon Ellsworth Kay''' (nee Gutenbach) is a woman from Penn Hills, Pennsylvania. After working as a general manager at a local Walmart for 27 years, she joined t...")
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Sharon Ellsworth Kay

Sharon at a campaign event in 2023
BirthMay 13th, 1962
ParentsShaun Kay, Darla Kay
CareerWalmart General Manager, Presidential Candidate
Known forrunning on the Neoliberal Sonic Fans' Party ticket for president in 2024

Sharon Ellsworth Kay (nee Gutenbach) is a woman from Penn Hills, Pennsylvania. After working as a general manager at a local Walmart for 27 years, she joined the local school board in 2017, claiming to know the "right way" to teach the nation's children. After a viral video of her running around in a chicken costume labeled "TOO CHICKEN TO TEACH GOOD" during a middle school assembly in 2022, she was selected as a "compromise candidate" to run for president of the United States under the Neoliberal Sonic Fans' Party banner.

While she loved the neoliberal order that she claimed helped her buy a home for $300 while working part time at McDonalds in 1977 (before neoliberalism took shape), she actually had never played any "Sonic the Hedgehog" games and thus could not form an opinion in line with the party.