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Jeffrey Meena
Jeffrey Meena
| Name | Jefferson Davis Meena |
| Birth | October 10th, 1960 |
| Spouse | Tara Smelt (1982-1990), Carla Ambrosia Suarez (1997-2015) |
| Children | Jill Meena |
| Career | Film Tycoon, Coffee Wizard, Child Trafficking |
| Known for | Film Tycoon; President of the United States |
Jeffrey Meena is a billionaire Hollywood elite who founded and leads Meena Productions.
He was born in 1960 in Salton City, California to parents Gordon Meena and Dorothy Villian Meena. His parents collected salt and thought the film industry was "evil and a waste of time," but then a tragic event occurred. The Big Salt Splash of 1975, an event in which Gordon Meena fell into a salt sludge in the sea and was never recovered. Jeffrey was at a crossroads. Given a large sum of money from his father's will, Jeffrey decidedly "turned to the dark side" and abandoned his mother and left for Hollywood.
His first film appearance was as a pizza boy in "Attack of the Goop". He soon turned to editing B movies for people. By under-utilizing his talent and upping the number of films produced, his company was formed and quickly became one of the biggest producers of imported B movies in Hollywood. By 1980, he had a net worth of over $400 million. Meena Productions began to rival Nigeria's Nollywood companies, and he centered his business trips on gathering aspiring filmmakers from Morocco, Mauritania, Senegal, the Gambia, and Sierra Leone. He married a random but very hot woman, Tara Smelt, in 1982. Their marriage lasted only 8 years, before a harsh divorce that caused Tara Smelt to take approximately 50% of Jeffrey's wealth. This began a dark period in Jeffrey's life, where he began desperately expanding his African operations, creating 150 movies and 35 television series from 1990 to 2000. It was during this time period that he met his next wife, Carla Ambrosia Suarez, who would soon give birth to Jill Meena in 1998.
After embarking on a quest for the power of the Crimson Bean, Meena began using Gambian children and coffee to gain fertility. This began his political career, in which he and a coalition known as FraPPUCiNO worked together to gain influence over the powers that be.
He won the 2020 presidential election and became the 46th president of the United States, and he emphasized an anti-Starbucks and pro-Gambia position. Without the guidance of the Friendly Council, the United States was significantly less powerful, and he was unaware of the Gambian coffee pirate movement actively taking over the Panama Canal. When the Bean Boarders invaded Catalina Island in 2022, he created a secret alliance with Iced Mondatta in order to collect fertility.